Walking Backwards

Was today an interesting day! We actually made it in the door of the local Unitarian church. It was a lot better than my recent excursions into the church, and the subject matter of the sermon was something I was truly interested in. I only got to sit through half of the service before the little one decided to pull me out the door, but the nursery I took him to was incredible. It exceeded my expectations. It had its own courtyard with tons of outdoor toys and a swingset. The staff on hand were all early childhood specialists and there were also a ton of parents there. Nicholas couldn't believe the wealth of new toys he had at his disposal. If we do go back, I know he won't let me out of his sight at first, but I think this is the place that would make him break away a little. The people were very friendly and the church itself is affiliated with CUUPS (for those of you questioning how I could set foot inside a church [not that I'm affiliated with CUUPS, just saying how offbeat it is]). We shall see how Joe feels about it.


I looked at my calendar today and found out that if Joe and I want to have another baby (see previous post), we have another three weeks to decide if we want to have a baby in the next year. I need the baby to be born at the beginning of the summer for my and Nico's school schedules. Since I use a birth control option that lasts for three months and my next dose is in July. . . We have a lot to think about in a short period of time. The pressure is on from the family too, and I find myself weighing the options more often every day. The truth is that I don't want Nicholas growing up without the closeness of a sibling relationship. At the same time, I feel really selfish about what I want to do with my life. Also, there is this ten pounds I have been trying unsuccessfully to lose. I know there is not going to be a strait forward answer, but for anyone who knows absolutely, let me know.